Celebrate Every Small Success
When Angela and I first met through the Internet, she was in quite a state. Hoping that astrology might be helpful to her in some way, she was only too happy to confide her birth details to me. A closer look at her birthchart, and the progressions of her planets in particular, clearly revealed that the time had come for successfully making the major changes that had been long overdue in her life.
As we learn to go with the flow of our life and pay attention to what kind of lessons are moving through it, the likelihood of being victorious where before we may have failed are much greater than ever before. Some things are meant to be at certain times. Lo and behold! Only a short time after starting our work together, she reported that she had succeeded in not over-eating for ten whole days. But, to her bitter disappointment this was followed by what seemed to her a total relapse.
My response was: How good it is to hear that you managed not to over-indulge in food for ten days! That truly is an achievement, especially as it is so very early in your healing journey of a thousand miles. Whenever you are in danger of sliding back into your old habits, the most important thing is to try not to be too hard on yourself. Remember that Rome was not built in a day! Well, yes I know – that this is only because you and I were not on the job. But joking aside, your healing process is likely to take quite some time. That is why the most important gift you can give yourself now is being patient, as well as kind and loving to yourself – without taking this to excess.
For the moment, it is sufficient to start making efforts to find the understanding that will help you get to the roots of your problem. Digging up the things that are troubling our soul, is to my mind always the best possible approach to all disorders that are likely to have their origin in deep underlying soul dilemmas. The only reason why they are rearing their heads now is that they are waiting to be resolved, during this lifetime. So, get going on this – gaze into the mirror of your own self not only with utter honesty, but also with kindness and compassion towards your suffering.
Whatever you do, it is of the utmost importance not try to do too much at once, but to set small and achievable targets instead. When there is some progress, stop and reward yourself with something beautiful – if possible not in the form of food. But if your cravings are too great, give in to that. If need be, have a binge for a day or two – but know all the time in your own mind that when this urge has been satisfied once again, you will go back to more sensible and healthy ways of living. As soon as you have done this successfully once or twice, your confidence will slowly build up and you will know that giving in occasionally does not mean you are back in your old habits. That is the only way they can slowly be changed.
I am glad to hear that you have found a good group and that you want to serve the people in it in some way. You will be able to do so – all in good time. At present it is enough for you to continue to attend the meetings to enjoy the company of like-minded people, who suffer from the same affliction as you. And I do not think it will take all that long until you can begin to share some of your learning with those around you, not only in the group but also in other daily encounters.
My advice is that you, like me, become one of life’s gleaners and gatherers. When others are sharing their findings, pick up the odd tasty morsel of knowledge from them and use it to your advantage. In that way, we can mutually act as teachers, pupils and healers to each other, as indeed we are meant to be. God’s great love and wisdom decreed that this is the only way some true and lasting progress can ever be made on anyone’s healing journey.
For those of us who are strongly under the influence of Saturn, as you and I are, trying to learn by conventional methods and going to ordinary schools most of the time cannot provide the answers we are seeking. Life itself has to be our teacher; it can teach us far more than that which is printed in books, even the best ones! Willingly accepting this makes some real progress on our evolutionary pathway possible. Do not begrudge Saturn’s role in your life, but remind yourself that the planet is merely a symbol for life’s great wisdom wishing to teach each one of us the all important qualities of self-mastery and patience. To bring a better and more peaceful world into being, and isn’t that what we all need most of all? If under Saturn’s guidance we can just keep on keeping on, by the end of this lifetime we are sure to get where we need to be; we all do in the end.
As Angela slowly began to feel more confident about herself and her quest to overcome her affliction, the feverish activity of the first stage of our work together slowly subsided. We only heard from each other occasionally and by the time this work had reached its final preparation, there had been no sign from Angela for several months. That, to me, was a good sign and as it should be. In her case, no news certainly was good news. It meant that she was capable of walking without assistance from me again and that she is getting on with her life. Equipped with a new understanding of herself and her predestined pathway through life, she is now holding onto the hands of God and the Angels, instead of mine. Thanks be to them for all their help and love for each one of us.
Recommended Reading:
• ‘When Food is Love – Exploring the Relationship between Eating and Intimacy’ by Geneen Roth
• ‘Breaking Free from Emotional Eating’ by Geneen Roth
• ‘It’s Not About Food – Change your mind, change your life, end your obsession with food and weight’ by Carol Emery Normandi and Laurelee Roark.
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The above is a chapter from ‘The Spiritual Perspective Of Eating Disorders’
If it has whetted your appetite to read more, please follow the link below:
‘The Spiritual Perspective Of Eating Disorders’
