Cross-Gender Issues
Healing Abusive Relationships
Part A
As we know by now, we are in relationship with all life and everything is in relationship with us. Everybody is in need of making peace through finding healing for all our relationships: those with God and the Universe, with ourselves and everyone we come into contact with. This is especially true for the relationship with ourselves, the most difficult one of all.
Because we are now walking the road of evolving into fully integrated and healed human beings who are androgynous just like the Angels and God, ever more of us are waking up to the duality of our human nature. I believe that to this day there is a great deal of suffering in our world that could easily avoided. One of the best examples of this are the unfortunate and unhappy people in our world who are struggling with coming to terms with their sexuality and the physical bodies they were born into, and the gender role they think has been allocated to them, without their approval.
How can we help them to understand the signals their soul and their Highest Self are constantly trying to give them that they are by no means some kind of freak of nature. If only they knew that all human beings on the Earth plane have a feminine and a masculine side to their nature, and that if we have spent sufficient numbers of lifetimes as a woman, it is highly likely that we decide – in the world of light a long time before returning to life in physicality – that the time has come for us to start working on the development and integration of the masculine aspect of our nature. And that is why they, together with the wise ones in charge of them, decided that they should experience their next lifetime by playing the role of a man.
Considering this background, it does not come as a surprise if during our growing up years identity problems arise for us when we find ourselves in the body of a boy. It is quite likely that in that case from early childhood onwards we feel more like a girl than a boy. Because we have an unusually strong subconscious pull towards all things feminine, we may well begin to ask ourselves anxiously: ‘Is there something wrong with me? Am I a girl in a boy’s body? Oh dear, what’s going to happen to me?’ I believe that throughout the ages same sex relationships like male and female homosexuality have had their origin in the gender confusion discussed here.
Problems are bound to arise when we deny and forcefully suppress the needs and demands of the present and future, giving them preference to those of the past. If as a consequence of this we fail to honour and accept the sexual identity into which we were born and refuse to make an effort at taking part in the learning the masculine pathway would have provided for us, in all innocence – or better ignorance – we have entered into a destructive and abusive relationship with ourselves and ultimately our Creator. When the suffering this causes our spirit and soul eventually manifests itself in our physical body as pain, they are trying to give us a signal that the above named two relationships are crying out to us, their earthly self, to go in search of healing through understanding, rather than swallowing pills to suppress the symptoms and numb the pain.
To the wise ones in charge of us this kind of behaviour reveals that we have not yet learnt to trust the wisdom of the Great Father/Mother of all life, who loves each one of us totally, unconditionally and tenderly. This is the authority who provides for every one of our needs, whatever they may be and however strange they may at times appear to ourselves and those around us. If we thus far lack the understanding that some of the experiences that are coming our way really are necessary for our development of our psyche, the only way of finding is by working our way through them.
Sooner or later, we too shall understand that through our temporary earthly parents the Father/Mother created our physical body, this marvel of engineering, especially for us and the specific requirements of our coming lifetime. And we will also finally be able to perceive that God’s great plan of life is perfect; that Mother Nature, as a physical manifestation of the Great Mother, does not make mistakes; that nothing on the Earth plane happens perchance, and that everything that is in our lives is there as a consequence of the seeds we have sown in other lifetimes in thoughts, words and deeds, because the Universal law of life knows no punishment, only reactions and consequences. Everything that is still wrong, evil or ugly in us and our world is waiting to evolve into something beautiful and perfect. The only reason why they ever came into existence and are still with us is to help us differentiate right from wrong, evil from good, and ugly from beautiful.
By that time we shall be able to accept that anything that appears to be wrong in our lives is there for a good and wise reason and that is to teach us something, and that the best way of finding out what that could be is by consulting with our inner guidance to help us understand. The wise one within is the Great Mother, who knows the way of all things and to those who are willing to listen to Her guidance that rises from deep within the core of our being into our conscious awareness, she is always willing to help, but not without having been asked.
Abusive relationships are the main culprits for constantly recharging our world with vibrations of negativity, jealousy, anger and hatred. That’s why such connections are particularly badly in need of healing. The suffering they bring is caused by ignorance, like the rest of every bit of the misery and distress of our world. Most and maybe all of the anguish of those who are unhappy about their gender could easily be avoided if they understood that they themselves once chose who and what they are going to be in their next earthly lifetime, and where and under what conditions they will be spending it.
If those who are affected by this fail to learn about this before their present earthly sojourn has run its course, they are in serious danger of throwing away a whole lifetime that, instead of being a deeply unhappy and frustrated one, could have been filled with opportunities for first discovering and then positively and constructively developing the duality of their nature. With endless patience and love the Universe had it on offer for them, but not to worry. The failure merely means that the experiences of this particular lifetime have to be repeated in another one.
If we reject one aspect of our nature, instead of lovingly accepting and embracing all of them, no progress is possible for growing into a more balanced and integrated human being, who lives happily and peacefully with every part of their being. The gift of another lifetime has been granted for the purpose of learning how to heal them together, so that they can begin to co-operate with each other in peace and harmony, the way they are doing in our Creator, God and Goddess. Anyone who holds onto the past and its experiences is in serious danger of wasting their present lifetime. In that case, a repetition will be required in the hope that this time round the spirit/soul’s message will succeed to seep into the consciousness of its earthly counterpart to help it understand the higher purpose of its present lifetime. When it finally dawns on the small self that the concerns of the spirit are of far greater importance than those of its earthly existence, the long overdue evolutionary step forward has at last been made.
Here is some wisdom about finding our place and role in the great plan of life from ‘The Milk Is White’: ‘What we do as we move forward can be compared to us laying down paving, as we absorb and apply various principles and shed our negative aspects and attitudes to replace them with new and positive ones. The path itself is, within general parameters, already set down before us but in setting the paving tiles in place by our efforts we are slowly, one by one, consolidating our path and giving it a definition. It may well be that at times we falter or take a step backwards, but the tiles remain in place and give us a firm footing when we tread there again. We never destroy what we have created in this way, even if we slide back a long way and return to it, tired and bruised but a lot wiser.’
Each time one of us returns to the predestined pathway of their life battered and bruised, we do so having grown stronger, wiser and more understanding. And when re-enter our true home into the world of light at the end of another lifetime on the Earth plane, our spirit and soul once again becomes aware of its real nature. Earthly life having fulfilled its purpose once more, we have every reason to be happy and give thanks and praise to our Creator’s wisdom for always providing us with the experiences we need to evolve and grow into an ever more beautiful and perfect, i.e. whole being.
Recommended Reading:
• ‘I Asked The Universal Christ’
• ‘Dealing With The Shadows Of The Past’
Part A – ‘Letting Go Of Fear And Pain’
Part B – ‘The Fear Of Annihilation’
Part C – ‘Waking Up From The Illusion Of Separateness’
Part D – ‘Why Is Earth Life Necessary?’
The above is a chapter from ‘Astrology As A Lifehelp In Relationship Healing’.
If it has whetted your appetite to read more, please follow the link below:
‘Astrology As A Lifehelp In Relationship Healing’